{"id":125,"date":"2009-01-21T21:02:29","date_gmt":"2009-01-21T21:02:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/livinginoblivion.wordpress.com\/?p=125"},"modified":"2009-01-21T21:02:29","modified_gmt":"2009-01-21T21:02:29","slug":"a-bitter-brew","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/livinginoblivion\/nondricks-non-adventure\/a-bitter-brew\/","title":{"rendered":"A Bitter Brew"},"content":{"rendered":"

I reach Leyawiin at nightfall, meaning the shops have closed and I’m forced to peddle my mushrooms and mushroom-related potions at the DragonClaw Inn. This isn’t a huge problem, except that innkeepers generally have a 50 dollar per transaction limit, so selling my 52 Restore Fatigue potions for 13 bucks each is going to take a lot of clicking.<\/p>\n

Still, when I’m done buying, mixing, and selling, I’m sitting on over 2,600 septims. Noice! I’ll have to see what a house goes for in this town. For now, it’s off to bed in the Dragon Claw Inn.<\/p>\n

In the morning, I hit The Dividing Line, a weapons and armor shop, get everything repaired, and sell off my extras. I’m ditching all my heavy armor — it’s just too slow and clunky when worn by an alchemist who is already far too slow and clunky. Leather armor it is, until I can find something light to upgrade to.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Next, I visit the Great Chapel of Zenithar. Forget what the tour books say:\u00a0 it\u2019s not that great. It looks exactly like every other chapel I\u2019ve been in. On the other hand, I finally find a priest selling a spell that will allow me to heal my horse, Beaker. It\u2019s called Convalescence, and it costs me about 230 gold. Worth it, though, as now I\u2019ll be able to take care of my beloved horsie.<\/p>\n

I visit a few other shops, plus the Mage\u2019s Guild, looking for ingredients to cure my wolf-borne diseases. I\u2019m also looking for some shoes, since I don\u2019t seem to have any for some reason, and a leather helmet to replace my iron one. No luck on either front. I\u2019m also starting to get a bit frustrated about my disease situation. I just need one stinking ingredient with the Cure Disease property, but I can\u2019t find one, or buy one, anywhere. With all these canine diseases in my system, I’m more dog now, than man.<\/p>\n

Meanwhile, the hot topic in this exciting new town is focused on one thing: a woman named Rosentia Gallenus and how her house smells.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Well, this is a bit sad.\u00a0 The game has definitely gotten the impression that I’m not looking for adventure — in fact, I’m actively avoiding it — and it’s stooping so low as to repeatedly invite me to check out a stinky house.<\/p>\n

Two things about this.\u00a0 First off, even as a non-adventurer, it’s just not appealing.\u00a0 Okay, it doesn’t sound dangerous and thrilling, which is a plus in Nondrick’s book, but it doesn’t sound pleasant, either.\u00a0 Why not have her house smell like fresh herbs?\u00a0 Then I might take a peek.<\/p>\n

Secondly, if I were <\/em>an adventurer, running about trying to close Oblivion gates and stave off demon hordes, why the hell would I want to check out a smelly house, either?\u00a0\u00a0 Sure, it sounds like there’s definitely a problem in there, but I’m busy trying to save the frigging world<\/em>.\u00a0 This seems like a quest fit for absolutely no one.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Okay, that’s a little better.\u00a0 An adventurer might pop his head in now and see what’s going on.\u00a0 Still, I ain’t interested.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

At the castle, I discover that the house for sale in Leyawiin can be had for only $7,000 bucks. That\u2019s not bad at all. I check out some nearby houses to see what mine might look like, and it\u2019s practically a mansion for your humble alchemist. Beats my one room hovel in Imperial City, though I\u2019m not crazy about the location. Leyawiin is in the very deep south, at the very bottom of the game’s map, and as a gatherer, I need fertile land in all directions to make a living.\u00a0 I\u2019d better check out the surrounding countryside to peep what groweth there.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I strike out to the west and north the next morning. There\u2019s not much to find in the marshy landscape except more mushrooms. A Khajiit bandit (female, of course) attacks me after I poke my unprotected noggin into Undertow Cavern. She falls with just a two swings of my longsword.\u00a0 Should’ve spent more time practicing and less time on the complicated hairdo.\u00a0 Women!<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Upon finding Telepe, some Ayleid ruins, I hear a voice yell \u201cShowing your face around here is the last mistake you\u2019ll ever make!\u201d I\u2019m a little confused, since the speaker sounded like he was about a mile away and hollering into a bucket. No one appears and attacks me as I wander carefully around. Eventually, I\u2019m struck by a number of arrows, but I still have no idea where from.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I stroll away, arrows protruding, confused.\u00a0 I’ve learned my lesson, though, and I won’t show my face in that general area again.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

In a small settlement called Water\u2019s Edge, I let myself into the home of Jolie and Eduard Retiene, a pleasant couple who have chosen to spend their day standing and silently contemplating one of the walls in their home. Guess they\u2019re waiting for TV to be invented.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m so desperate for finding a curative ingredient that I break one of my rules and raid their garden, picking all the vegetables and examining their properties. No dice. Feeling guilty for stealing from these humble, gently retarded farmers, I drop a silver cup and a couple repair hammers in the garden I just molested, as a form of payment. It\u2019s sort of like in a movie, when a mobster smashes a reporter\u2019s camera and then chucks some bills from a roll of hundreds on the ground, only not even remotely as cool.<\/p>\n

A little further up the road, I find the settlement known as Border Watch. It\u2019s sizable, with several homes and a cluster of citizens all standing around talking to each other about horribly boring things. I stop at the Border Watch Inn, where the owner has \u2013 get this — a cheese collection.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

How awesome is that? That\u2019s way better than my collection of silverware I\u2019ve pulled out of wolf rectums. Way better. I\u2019m insanely jealous.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I step back outside, and chat up the locals. One of them has a cool black cloak and hood. Again, I\u2019m jealous. Nondrick would look great in a hood like that.\u00a0 At least from the back.\u00a0 I\u2019m starting to hate Border Watch \u2013 it\u2019s making me feel inadequate. These NPCs are much cooler than I am.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I approach a house and, since it\u2019s unlocked, let myself inside. It\u2019s totally trashed. Weird.\u00a0 In a busted crate, a potion of Cure Disease mocks me. The game itself is mocking me, I decide. As I chose to snub the overflowing adventure it constantly attempts to drown me in, it has chosen to make my own personal quest, to cure my own diseases with my alchemical skills, impossible. I\u2019ll never cure my diseases. Not without having to resort to theft. Not without breaking my rules.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m beginning to feel like a failure of an NPC. I don\u2019t have a kickass cheese collection and for all my time spent picking ingredients and mixing potions, I\u2019m still crawling with canine parasites. And I don\u2019t even have a pair of shoes or a nice hood. No wonder I never score with the honeys.<\/p>\n

I wander around the town for a bit. There are several sheep walking about. Maybe it\u2019s the wolf parasites infesting my system, but I consider killing one of the sheep. Mutton might have some curative properties, after all. No one is around. I\u2019m desperate. I hack at a sheep, which takes considerably longer to fall than the female bandit from earlier.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

I kill it, and open it up to see what’s inside.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

This sheep, somehow, is completely empty.\u00a0 Mutton-free. I guess it was full of air.\u00a0 Goddamn discount sheep.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Despondent, I let myself into another house, which is also weirdly trashed. I spot some shoes on a table and consider taking them. Why not? I\u2019ve raided a garden. I\u2019ve murdered livestock. The game is clearly denying my the few things I want and need, and it’s turning me into a crazed, thieving, half-wolf NPC.<\/p>\n

I also spot a Shepherd\u2019s Pie on the table. I pick it up to examine its properties.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Bingo. It\u2019s the ingredient I need to cure myself. And all it will take is an act of theft.<\/p>\n

Is it really theft if I leave something as payment, like I did in the garden? Am I being un-NPC-like? Am I failing in my goal in playing as a benign alchemist? Am I betraying my inner-Nondrick by killing air-filled livestock and swapping near-worthless items with unknowing NPCs?<\/p>\n

Screw it.\u00a0 I mix up my Cure Disease potion. One part purchased Elf Cup Cap, one part stolen Shepherd\u2019s Pie. The deed is done. I drop a couple repair hammers as payment and walk outside.<\/p>\n

I can cure myself right now. Right now! \u00a0 But should I?\u00a0 My one self-driven quest is at an end, but it meant buying one ingredient and stealing another, and then smooshing them together in a cup.\u00a0 One sip, and I’m cured.<\/p>\n

But can I do it?\u00a0 Should <\/em>I do it?\u00a0 Should I belt back this bitter beverage of betrayal? Should I deviously down this dirty drink of disappointment?\u00a0 Should I peevishly partake of this perverse potion of something starting with p?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I reach Leyawiin at nightfall, meaning the shops have closed and I’m forced to peddle my mushrooms and mushroom-related potions at the DragonClaw Inn. This isn’t a huge problem, except that innkeepers generally have a 50 dollar per transaction limit, so selling my 52 Restore Fatigue potions for 13 bucks each is going to take […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":1806,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[684],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-125","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-nondricks-non-adventure","section-livinginoblivion","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/125"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=125"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/125\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1806"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=125"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=125"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.screencuisine.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=125"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}